digging the heart..

last kiss playing~(recently my favorite country song)

right now i feel so empty inside..to many things i keep deep down my heart..so i manage to post this post..firstly about him,he's changing right now..to be better..n thank god..i love it..seriously..i love you so much syg:')but i know there's some consequences from his changing..i don't totally know what he's feeling..he keeps things inside..we're like falling apart:'..plus,there's some people who wants us to be apart..i don't have any idea what to do with'em anymore..sometimes,i can't straightly follow what they want me to do..i am myself..and you might think it's easy being me..i am only human..sometimes i laugh..sometimes i cry..sometimes i pretend..just to go on with the life in here..i want to paint my face and pretend that i am someone else..but i still can't..living in this place makes me sad(exception for the study time)..this place makes me think that i am too bad..sometimes i get so fed up n i don't want to look at myself in the mirror..i am not strong to deal with this..

p/s:i need you now dear:'(

thanks reader..

get well soon syg:'

Please feel better syg..get back to urself real soon..if u're ill,i hurt cause i care..

whenever u're sick,a part of me mourns..i keep thinking dat life isn't fair..

i worry about you and wish you the best..please get well and become safe and sound..

dat will give me new hope and i wont need to mope..when i see dat u're smile and around..

i remembered the first time i saw u real sick n i'm grateful i was there for you..ur face in pain worrying me until now..u're in pain again tonight..n i feel so tortured cz i'm far away from you now..i'm sorry dear cause i wont be able to reach you tonight..:'(

love,

jaja

2011

Dear reader,

                  I think its been quite some times i don't write in this blog..it's not like i'm busy doing work or what-so-ever..but i just don't have mood of writing..no idea pops out from my mind..huh!plus,i love to attach some pics in every post i made..bad news!my camera is broken for the third time..omaigod jaja..how u handle ur things-.-'..(dh segan dh nk mntk new camera from ayh)..i think i want to hold on dulu lahh..guys!it is 2011!err..why i get so excited?watever..so,maybe starting from this post,my new year 'azam' is to update my blog..

c'est tout de moi..merci:)

hugs n kisses,

jaja..